Too many episodes of Queer as Folk and The L-Word for Esther? Perhaps. But that’s not the point of this NY Times article about the art (and artifice) of the social kiss, especially in business settings.

The kiss is “happening more and more,” agreed Peggy Post, a spokeswoman for the Emily Post Institute founded by the doyenne of etiquette. “We’re much more informal in everything from the clothes we wear to how we greet people.” Ms. Post advocates the handshake and agrees that it’s better “to steer clear of kissing people of the opposite sex, which can be misconstrued in some cases.” This is especially true on first meetings. Later, kissing as a greeting depends on the relationship, she and others said. [emphasis mine–edk]

I think the answer is for all of us to become shomer negiah all the time except for when we are in relationships with other people. Think of the clarity: first of all, no awkward business kisses. (Or Shabbos kisses, if any of you remember those boggling busses from that time between the Friday night service and dinner at Camp Ramah or USY Conventions.) Secondly, you’d never have to ask “What is the deal with those two? Are they dating or not?” nor would you ever have to answer “Well, no one knows for sure.”

Kissing etiquette is hard. So that’s why I’m glad my staff of research assistants sends me articles like these, with helpful hints buried on page two of the article, like the fact that Blistex maintains a section on kissing etiquette (and pretty much anything you’d ever want to know about lips) on their site.

On a not wholly unrelated note, today I bought two new lipglosses. Smooches, everyone! Or not…