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According to Reuters in London, speed dating is out, and “feed dating” is in, “where the love-hungry can at least enjoy a good meal if they don’t find romance.”

Meeting people at dinner parties has become the most popular way for Britons in their 30s to find a new partner, according to a survey by food firm Geest. Of 1,000 single people, 34 percent said they wanted to combine food with flirting — with a safety net of having friends with them if the dinner date went pear-shaped.

Because JDaters Anonymous is a service-based weblog, we are pleased to provide you with this handy list of things to avoid when “feed dating”:

1. The Blooming Onion (greasy oil all over face and hands is almost never a portent of romance)
2. Any garlic-based dishes (no explanation is required, is it?)
3. Pesto (believe me, this one is bad–no matter how many times you try to dislodge the stuff from the crevices between your teeth, it’s not coming out until you brush it out with some Crest or Colgate later at home…)
4. Poppy seed bagels (see “pesto”)
5. Deli (deli is not sexy…except maybe pastrami, with its blend of pungent spices, which can get stuck in your teeth, see “pesto”)
6. Red wine (it stains your teeth almost instantly, and certain colors of long-wearing lipstick actually can also pick up the tint, creating a “clown mouth” effect…don’t ask me how I know that…)
7. Grapefruit (no way to eat this and not spritz your date in the eye with a blinding spray of citrus)
8. Chocolate (because of the teeth thing–see “pesto”–, and because it may remind you that you have no need for companionship of the opposite sex)
9. Matzah (crumbles into a million specks that will instantly adhere to clothing and make you look like you suffer from gargantuan dandruff)
10. Pasta with red sauce (because you will ALWAYS spill it all over yourself, especially if you’re wearing white)

Not quite the Ten Commandments. But I think they’re decent suggestions.

Welcome to DruzeDate.com. (I know what you’re thinking: “They don’t look Drusish.”)

In a culture distinguished by its privacy and closely guarded traditions, Web sites like DruzeDate.com are revolutionizing the Druse dating scene. The Druse are a small and distinct religious group that broke with Islam about a thousand years ago; their communities are mainly in Lebanon, Syria and northern Israel. Because the Druse do not accept converts, a strong emphasis is placed on self-preservation through marrying within the Druse community.

While DruzeDate.com is the first all-Druse dating site, there is evidence that Druse singles have been using the Internet as a dating tool for years. A quick look at the message board of the American Druze Society in Washington, DC (www.adsdchouse.com), shows personal ads being posted on the message board as early as 2000. While most of the ads list the typical requirements – apparently “nice face” and “slimness” play an equally important role in the American Druse community as in the general American one – many ads rant about the “closed-ness” of the Druse community. “Druse girls are impossible to date,” wrote one frustrated user. “They expect so much and think they can be so picky. I am going to give up on them soon, and start dating white chicks!”

That whole construct of men wanting women to have nice faces and be slim while complaining that it’s the women who are picky? Sounds awfully familiar to me. I really wonder how many of these complaints are universal dating issues, how many are indigenous to strongly affiliated tribal cultures, and how many are 21st century societally impacted.

More at Jewlicious.

A friend wrote me yesterday about a friend of hers. I’d file this under “Be Careful” and “The More You Know.” And just to clarify, I’m not saying that this kind of thing only happens on JDate. It just pays to be careful.

Last week a friend went on a JDate. It was a her first date with the guy. He took her to dinner and a bar. He walked her home and asked to use her bathroom. She let him up and he proceeded to brutally rape her. The DA is working on the case so I can’t reveal much but I do want to warn you. His name is Devon or Devin, he’s 33 and lives in Brooklyn. Apparently his profile is still up but I don’t know what it is. Please be careful and don’t let anyone up to your apartment if you do not know him!

CoolSJF (a pseudonym), a longtime reader of JDaters Anonymous, writes:

I’ve been a non-paying member of jdate for a couple years now and a friend finally convinced me to pay for a month. Believe me, I’m regretting it…. Please see the below, very upsetting IM conversation iIhad with a jdater. I wish there were some way to have him blacklisted. Maybe I should contact Jdate?? What are your thoughts? Should I do anything or just forget about it?

[J.A. note: all names have been changed. Some offensive language–and tons of offensive typos– follows.]

weirdosjm: hi
coolsjf: yo
weirdosjm: whats up beutiful
coolsjf: not much. i wish itwere a beautiful day out like it was on monday
weirdosjm: i know right
coolsjf: i know we’ve chatted b4, but will u remind me where we met / what your profile is?
weirdosjm: jdate, IMmeNow
coolsjf: aha that’s rigth
weirdosjm: good
weirdosjm: remember i liked ur smile
coolsjf: indeed
weirdosjm: so whats up
coolsjf: just chillin’. still recuperating from the wkd
weirdosjm: i c
weirdosjm: so re we going to get some coffee some time?
weirdosjm: hello?
coolsjf: HA I KNEW IT
coolsjf: sorry wrong IM
weirdosjm: what?
weirdosjm: so r we?
weirdosjm: hello?
coolsjf: well…
coolsjf: the thing is… i’m sort of seeing someone right now
weirdosjm: no ur not
weirdosjm: y r u on jdate then
coolsjf: b/c i just started seeing him
weirdosjm: so it dont mean anything
coolsjf: doesn’t
weirdosjm: so y cant we hang out
coolsjf: things are pretty crazy
weirdosjm: whatever
weirdosjm: alot of girls tellme this nad 2 weeks later they r back on jdate
coolsjf: fine.
coolsjf: well #1 i am seeing someone
coolsjf: #2 i am just not that interested
weirdosjm: ur not seeing nay one
coolsjf: but it’s hard to tell someone that
coolsjf: i am.
weirdosjm: c not interested
weirdosjm: i told u
coolsjf: but it’s 2 reasons
weirdosjm: its ok i’ll put in that category any way
coolsjf: it’s a guy in jersey who has come to the city multiple times to take me out.
coolsjf: and i think it might be going somewhere.
weirdosjm: plus i just looked at ur pic any way
weirdosjm: u think?
weirdosjm: ok n ever mind, ur oic says it all any way
weirdosjm: pic*
weirdosjm: ur probabnly a virgin any way
coolsjf: so now you are resorting to insulting me?
coolsjf: sheesh.
weirdosjm: and not clean shaved
coolsjf: like that would be a character flaw even if it were true.
coolsjf: come on.
weirdosjm: yup
coolsjf: take rejection like a man.
weirdosjm: i c u have no experince
weirdosjm: u call that a rejection?
weirdosjm: u really have no experince
weirdosjm: no wonder ur on the site
coolsjf: i am a very fun social girl with a lot of friends and no lack of interested guys.
weirdosjm: thats ur problem
coolsjf: read it again.
coolsjf: try to comprehend.
coolsjf: where did you go? YU?
weirdosjm: hell no
coolsjf: or a technical school that doesn’t actually award bachelor degrees?
weirdosjm: i am getting my licensce soon and wil make more than people with masters
coolsjf: license
coolsjf: but at least they can spell
coolsjf: and come across as competent, intelligent and caring.
weirdosjm: its a c omputer moran
coolsjf: moron
weirdosjm: i’m chatting with 6 people
coolsjf: mazel tov
weirdosjm: thanks bitch
coolsjf: so let’s stop talking. it’s a waste of my time.
weirdosjm: ur time?
weirdosjm: ok cunt go
weirdosjm: and some advise change t he pic on ur profile
coolsjf: ADVICE
coolsjf: why? ’cause i dont’ wear make-up? ’cause i’m honest about what i’m like?
weirdosjm: no its more than that
coolsjf: don’t worry. i’ve attracted guys who i’m interested in
weirdosjm: i’m sure u have that y ur on it every day
coolsjf: i’m not going to stoop to insulting you, but your profile is nothing to brag about (pictures and content)
coolsjf: actually i’m not,but even if it were true, how would you know it? it would mean that YOU’RE on every day
weirdosjm: u know how many emails i get everyday
weirdosjm: and its STOP
weirdosjm: not stoop
coolsjf: no it’s STOOP, you imbecile. look it up in a dictionary.
weirdosjm: i am on every day the more pussy the better
coolsjf: i’m not going to STOOP to insulting you.
weirdosjm: u can keep goin
coolsjf: stoop as in bend down, get so low and pathetic as to do something.
coolsjf: that’s the literal definition. the way i used it was figurative.
weirdosjm: good so go teach then
coolsjf: why don’t you go on craig’s list if all you want is action ?
weirdosjm: i hope this guy see’s ur on jdate everyday
coolsjf: SEES
weirdosjm: whats craigs list
weirdosjm: ?
coolsjf: oh here you go. please leave jdate forever. go to newyork.craigslist.org — they have personals sections. it’s all free. you can go to “casual encounters.” it seems like it’s more your speed.
weirdosjm: k thanks
coolsjf: oh check it. there’s a website called f*ckbuddies.com. just what you need. it’s for slimey losers who can’t find a real relationship.
weirdosjm: i dont do that stuff those people arent clean
coolsjf: and you are? when were you last tested? given that you say: “i am on every day the more pussy the better”

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