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Adonises and Adonisettes of the world, be sure to warm up, stretching all of the major muscle groups, jog over to the computer that’s mounted over your treadmill, set the incline at 8.5 and the speed at 15 mph, and log on Fitness Singles, the site for people as obsessed with fitness as you are.

That’s right, now you can find someone who is as in love with his or her own body as you are with yours! Finally, the person to whom you can say, “honey, do these washboard abs make me look fat?”

Follow online dating registration with a rigorous circuit training workout, ending in three reps of 8-Minute Abs, and followed by a cool-down.