Group therapy in a blog.
“The Love Computer”
Last week, mid-heatwave, I saw a couple–visibly sweating into their clothing, causing darkening patches to puddle on their backs, chests and under their arms–who insisted on not just holding hands, but occasionally walking with his arm around her shoulder…you know, the
kind of people who never want to be apart, even if it’s 100 degrees out.
“You’ve found that special someone, and you never want to be apart…” I know that SNL’s “Love Toilet” was a fake product. Really. But I really have a feeling that this new trend of “Couple-Surfing” is an outgrowth of that kind of disgustingly-crazy-in-love couple, for whom PDA still means “public displays of affection.”
While I’m all for couples communicating–whatever method they decide to use–I feel like this trend introduces a third party and may not facilitate communication; in some cases, the intervening layer of technology may lead to misunderstandings…
In any case, thank Wired’s blog for this list of the interesting things couples said about how they view the internet, including:”An infomaniac is better off with another infomaniac who understands and partakes of their addiction, rather than mixing the tender electrovert
with a more organically-centered human,” and “There is something poetic in an e-mail correspondence, even if you see the other person every day. The e-mail personalities can be somehow different.”
I’ve long mourned the loss of the love letter tradition–will our emails of LOL and ROTFLs someday serve the same romantic and nostalgic function as the lovingly inscribed, handwritten declarations of feelings immortalized by couples separated by life and war and parental or social impediments? Perhaps this trend of couples communicating with each other online might serve as a romance renaissance of sorts?
One thing’s certain…if the article/list reveals any essential truth, it is this statement:
“I think my lover would prefer it if I wasn’t checking blogs at 2 in the morning in my underwear.”
Yeah, we’re pretty sure you’re right about that.
I want to say ‘telegraph’ here, as we almost installed one in the den, but the telephone is our mainstay. It’s just more personal and intimate. I can count the times I’ve emailed too, and it’s much less than daily. I still write letters, but it is less often and for special occasions. They’re treasured and improv performances, as always.
I think people get seriously confused with all the communication options today. Emailing sweet nothings to your sweet? Probably not the best venue for a variety of good reasons. Such as most of the time you don’t & can’t really control the message and where it ultimately goes. [The Sysadmin does that for almost all job sites]. Text messages are fine for a ‘where U?’ sort of deal, and perhaps a bit of flirting, but again not really. Some presence is still desperately needed, and the more familiar here, the better you’ll get to know the other. No amount of emails are going to change that much. Words finely crafted are a fine start, and much of ‘blogging’ or longer venue writing is just that, a way of making yourself known to another. But for the closer there needs to be some real face time.
Cheers & Good Luck, ‘VJ’
“There is something poetic in an e-mail correspondence, even if you see the other person every day. The e-mail personalities can be somehow different.”
Thats just your fantasy, you interpret more inside as really existed…
Gee, my post has been resurrected. A slightly longer and more detailed version of the above is over at Esther’s MUK:
[http://estherkustanowitz.typepad.com/myurbankvetch2005/2006/08/the_love_comput.html]
And yes, we were thinking of the telegraph, but most we just shout from floor to floor like everyone else. But there still is no way to be heard all the way from the basement to the top floor. Which mostly is not any problem, except for these folks perhaps: [http://www.oneofakindhouse.com/fortress.html]
I like to think of them as Israeli’s in spirit. Cheers, ‘VJ’