Are you and your special lady in a relationship? Are you sure?

Are you and your boyfriend, like, totally broken up? Are you sure?

In the electronic age, there’s only one way to know: check all of your significant other’s online affiliations. Because he may still be cruising JDate, or she may have changed her MySpace designation from “In a Relationship” to “Single,” or your special someone may not be ready to move forward with you and only you–and you’ll find out because her Friendster relationship designation is now “It’s Complicated.”

But what are the rules? How long are you supposed to wait to change your status after a breakup — or, for that matter, when a relationship begins? And beyond checking off status, what should you do with sexy comments a fling has posted? Or when do you downgrade an ex’s online avatar from your list of top friends?

But really this isn’t news. Relationships are always complicated. The only way to make sure you’re on the same page is if you sit down and have a conversation. Close that IM window, kids–I’m talking about a real conversation. You know, the kind you have over dinner or even over the phone.

Yes, I’m radical. And still single, actually, so never mind, I have no idea what I’m talking about. Don’t do drugs–stay in school!