Let’s look at your symptoms.

1) You’ve become the consummate Googler, especially of your exes.
2) You’re a virtuoso Facebook stalker, especially of your exes.
3) You poke, IM or write email messages to your exes, trying to recapture the magic of yesteryear.
4) You’ve ever said, “all I want is to see her/him again.”

While all of us have probably Googled an ex from time to time, a few people are taking it to the next level, and trying to reunite with/resurrect lost loves via Facebook and other social media. If you’ve answered yes to any of the above questions, the Boston Phoenix (quoted in Time Magazine) thinks you’re a retrosexual: a creature born of the Facebook era, in which time passed does not end a relationship/obsession…

“You’re curious to see what she looks like, and it’s easy to fantasize about alternative courses your life might have taken.” It’s the same feeling that compels people to attend high school reunions.

Gentle reader, not all of us feel compelled to attend high school reunions. But I digress.

The piece shares stories of people who re-met after many years, to tepid – or incredibly awkward – results. But there’s always someone with the silver lining of a story that makes you think – hey, this just might work for me too…

[…]what about Elise Garber and her first kiss, Harlan Robins? For them, life really did resemble a romantic comedy. Robins remembered his summer-camp girlfriend and replied to her Facebook message. They agreed to meet for drinks the next time he was in Chicago. When they saw each other, something clicked. They talked into the night, went out the next day, then decided to give their long-distance retrosexual romance a try. Surprisingly, it worked. Garber quit her advertising job and moved to Seattle to be with him. On Sept. 6, they married. “And to think,” says Garber, “I worried that we’d spend the whole evening talking about summer camp.”

So there you have it. Retrosexuality leads to happiness. Just like JDate…it works for other people. Since all my exes are married, I’m looking forward to the next article: about how retrosexual homewrecking is the wave of the romantic future.