Group therapy in a blog.
“Hooking Up” Wants You…
Remember “Hooking Up,” the ABC NEWS documentary series about online dating in the big city (NY, that is)? Well, last night, I met two of the women who are casting Season 2. They were supercool themselves, and I volunteered to help them find some great potential candidates…it’s not even close to the show “Blind Date,” which is kitschy and mean-spirited (even if it is gut-wrenchingly hilarious at times)–it’s a much less invasive sort of camera, and you get a sense for what the people really are experiencing.
Here’s the blurb about what they’re looking for, and if you email them, let them know I’m the one Hooking you Up…
Are you ready for the dating experience of a lifetime??? ABC News is casting for the next season of ” HOOKING UP,” last summer’s hit documentary series about online romance, dating, sex and
relationships set in and around New York City. We are looking for outgoing and articulate women and men, straight or gay, ages 20-40, living in or near (and primarily dating in) Manhattan, who are currently internet dating… or extremely eager to try it. Let our cameras follow your online dating adventures!!! For an application or more information, please email hookingupseason2@gmail.com as soon as possible, like now! (We’ve got seriously tight deadlines… and you’ve got some serious dating to do.)
Have fun, and maybe I’ll see YOU on television…
This is exactly why I have been so bummed out lately: 20-40. So 41 and 1/2 year olds are too over the hill to want to date on National Television? Maybe I should just take up Mah Jonng and retire with my 65 year old mother (who has been happily married for 45 years.) I’m out of EVERYONE’s demographic lately. You tell the producers of “Hooking Up” that I am taking my disposable income and purchasing from advertisers on Lifetime and We and they are missing out on all the extra income that women in MY age demographic have. ERRRRRR !!!!!
I think you’d be great for this show, Chutzpah, and would be happy to tell them they need to up the age limit for you…then again, I sent the casting directors the URL here, so maybe they’ll respond themselves…
In any case…let me know!
I don’t know, I’m not sure I’d want TV cameras recording what I do when I look at JDate profiles.
7 BAM!!! (That would make a little sense if you played Mah-Jong.)
The real question is this. On a show called ‘Hooking Up’ do you in fact get to?
They will be doing some serious screening. They need very attractive, nice, positive people.
I don’t think they will be taking Kvetchers.
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Thanks Esther, let’s make it a double date for the two of us!
Jobfound – what’s the deal with your email address?
At the supreme risk of sounding like everyone’s 65+ mother & but for the love of all that is holy and just in the universe, please RUN FROM this ‘opportunity’. I’ve had enough of people debasing themselves on TV for entertainment’s sake. Yeah, I know this is a critical feature of the medium, and has been ever since Ernie Kovacs, (how’s that for an inside NY reference?)& Uncle Miltie, but it’s getting real old.
I hate what they do to people, even for the ‘best’ of intentions, and I’d hate to see what they’d do to hearts, tender or otherwise, of various denizens of the city just looking for love or simple companionship. Even Chutzpah, I’d hate to see her chewed up by the crew for not being this or that, or too much of this. If you are not ‘telegenic’ or have some obviously amusing personality flaws we can all appreciate in a voyeuristic orgy of self congratulatory self delusion, (‘Hey, at least I’m not that bad/pathetic/sad!’), they don’t want you. Count on it. If you’re anywhere near ‘normal’ you don’t make it on TV, except as a foil.
I’ve seen this same damn show in different formats for decades. If the producers think that they’re doing something ‘fresh’, they’re delusional as well. But they get paid well to be so, we just don’t all have to be part of the show.
And what an amazing degrading name for the show, huh? Silly and oh so stupid at the same time. Classic TV no doubt! And no, they’re not looking for anyone Near 40 unless you are seriously ‘entertaining’ in their demanding clown show sort of way. As in ‘See the 40 year old divorced mom juggle her kids and the 2 overtime jobs to make it to a date with hottie 20 something Tad where they have nothing in common so they drink themselves into oblivion and shout vague sexual innuendoes at each other over the too loud bar cover band’. I can see this action any night in most bars around the nation. We really do need to get out more!
Esther, I know you mean well, and I well know there’s probably a good ‘audience’ for this stuff, but some folks desire a bit more from their simple entertainments. I guess this is why I just read a lot. (On the other hand it’s your chance at instant celebrity for just ‘being there’! Oh the temptation!) Cheers, VJ’
I relate to Chutzpah’s comment about being over 40. But I think that people under 40 have some kind of hope (naivete, maybe) that makes them better subjects for this kind of show.
As an example, when Jen the Bachelorette had her second go-round, she was in agony knowing that she was interested in none of the guys — something she didn’t know the first time. It made you wince to watch.
The older and more experienced you are, the more you realize that there are huge problems, as well as built-in failure mechanisms, with online dating. Dramatic tension is lacking when your attitude has evolved to, “whatever” and when the process simply becomes not interesting (just as the guys you meet are not interesting).
Some 41 year old Moms don’t work the nite shift at Taco Bell. In fact, many 40 year old divorced Moms look better than their 30 year old married peers. Where do you suggest I go when I’m not “juggling” my children? Every singles event out there has an age cut-off of 4-ZERO. Except the ones that say “40-65″ and no thank you, I’m not partying with 65 year olds unless they are wearing a sequined bolero and singin'”Delilah”. I don’t even qualify for any “Young Professionals” events anymore.
But thanks for the advice on reality t.v., I do agree with you. Anyway, I can order-in for a 20 year old “Tad” delivered to my doorstep in 20 minutes or less with a free a bottle of cheap wine included any nite of the week through Jdate or Match.
To chutzpah: I don’t understand the Taco Bell comment but regarding your age comment, I would say that if you claim you are 39 1/2 instead of 41 1/2, who cares? Nobody is carding you to check and see whether you fall within the legal limit. It’s not as though the moment you hit 40 you turn into a pumpkin. But it also seems to me that you are exhibiting the same age-ism toward those 40 to 65-year-olds. What if the great guy for you is 45 or 55? By your lights, he is too old. Just as by the tv show’s lights, you are too old. Just pointing out the hypocracy — I mean inconsistency — here.
A more general point — and I don’t know whether Esther has addressed this in the past — is that singles events and online dating have extremely low success rates, especially for processes that claim to have a pool of people all supposedly dying to connect with someone. There are tons of reasons for this. They’re screening in men (men, particularly, because men have the prerogative of being the aggressors) who have been unable to find a relationship in normal ways, even if they claim to want one. Plus, in the real world, relationships don’t form as a result of one goal-directed meeting. They tend to evolve organically, between people who get to know each other naturally through school or work or friends — not because of a forced event where the pressure is so high that there’s no middle ground between a dinner date and booking the honeymoon.
As someone who regularly ‘partys’ with the over 65 set, I can tell you they can be a lot of fun & delightful to be around, (well at least the ladies), and I’m about your age Chutzpah. And if you can order a brace of 20 somethings ‘anytime you want’, that’s what I’d be doing on most date nights, at least until the money for the bubbly ran short. I mean that’s serious real entertainment. The rest is just TV! Cheers, ‘VJ’
Show me a 41 year old man who’s saying “I’m gonna find me some 45-55 year old booty tonight” and then accuse me of hypocrisy.
P.S. Good S.A.T. word there, who knew a collective group of bucks was called a “brace” or “clash”. Funny that a group of dogs is a “pack” and so is a group of rats.
Now Chutzpah, I never mentioned anything about ‘hooking up’ with some 45-55 old ‘booty’. (Truth be told I think the majority of my ‘party girls’ are older than that). I said they can be quite entertaining. I did generally recommend just having your way with the younger kids to satisfy your more immediate carnal desires & needs (where available & safe), as long as this is mutually acceptable. It’ll save time, effort and energy until such a moment when you discover a slightly older, perhaps more serious ‘playmate’.
And yes, I DO know plenty of guys who date slightly older women, and don’t think much of it. They have fun from the looks of it, and who am I to question this?
Me, I party with the older set because it’s an occupational hazard, and they’re just fun gals. They’ve got a lifetime of great stories, and they’re very easy to crack up. So given the chance between some good looking young fresh 20 something shapely eye candy and say an elderly Hungarian Jewish lady, honey it’s no contest who’s the more interesting person to talk to. Ditto for most of the old guys too, as long as they’re reasonably coherent and friendly. More & funnier stories, more things I can relate to, more real life lived means more interesting conversations.
Now truth be told, you’re looking for different sorts of entertainment, and this position may be somewhat hard to fill. This is why I’d think of fielding a ready transition team of young players. It’s a thought.
Cheers, ‘VJ’
One of my co-workers is an elderly woman from the Netherlands who escaped the Holocaust, so I can be reveled with those stories at every coffeebreak. Yes, my mother’s mah jong friends are a hoot and they love nothing more than good dirty jokes while slamming their tiles. I thank G-d the 20-30 somethings are into MILF’s and I can still attract them for a couple more years.
HOWEVER, what I really want is someone within 5 years either way of my own age, who I can have a conversation with, a meal with, travel with, rely on, and make love with. I do not understand why this has become the impossible dream for so many.
probably because you are giving off a bad inner vibe of some kind, Chutzpah.
It is the only explanation I can think of. You need to be honest w/ yourself and analyze this. IOW, the more you but the blame, ‘out there’ the less it will help you. There is some inner peace that u are lacking, and this is turning men off. They would rather hang out w/ someone more at peace and calm w/ herself.
All u need to do imho, is get into some breathing and relaxation exercises, so as to get in tune w/ your inner chi. This will bring you the at peace feeling that you desire.
To deny what I am saying is fine, but the results are what you are reporting all the time.
The producers and editors of “Hooking Up” took hundreds of hours of footage and chopped it up into teeny tiny sound bites, giving viewers the impression that the women “subjects” were either shallow, crazy or extremely horny. One of the subjects, Reisha, has a blog describing her experiences — see http://ventureheart.com/blog